Bond member, founder of FaceMyAbuse and Domestic Violence survivor and activist, Jackie Rowe, passionately brings light to the often voiceless subject of domestic abuse that affects men and women everywhere.
First, let me say that, if you are reading this you are a seeker of knowledge.
If you have never suffered domestic abuse, you are an ally. If you have suffered domestic abuse, you are no longer a victim, you are a survivor. Together, we all must recognize, define and standup to any domestic abuse in our lives, address it and end the cycle of violence.
Female activist demonstrating to stop domestic abuse.
As an activist for more than 17-years, and I am considered to be a strong voice in many communities. Many credit me with being a great inspiration for the survival skills I have used to overcome my personal abuse. I am a 20-year survivor of domestic violence and I will tell anyone seeking a way out that LOVE DOESN’T HURT. Punching, kicking, spitting, mocking, kicking, or shaming is not the love you deserve. It’s not even love. It’s control. You must use all of the support resources, hotlines (800.656.HOPE), support groups, friends and technology afforded you. They are tools to help. We are all different yet, sadly, share many of the same painful situations.
You are not to blame.
Love doesn’t hurt. 
End the cycle of violence. 
You are not to blame.
Use the tools that will work best to alleviate your specific situation; to change your story.
Self-preservation is the first law of nature. Use your instinct and do not ignore the warning signs of control and abuse. Some warning signs are passive, but most are aggressive. None should be ignored.
The first sign … Will remain the same, like a flashing red light. You should not proceed. No always means, no. Fight or flight. Both can save our lives. But to leave any situation that endangers your well-being is always the best, although not always the easiest, option.
There is never an excuse. 
Get help. Change your story.
I’ve been there before. Please don’t wait to make this decision. Making excuses for your partner will not help. Like, if they are going through a lot. No. Stop means stop. Love is not pain. We have all been hurt, but that doesn’t give another human being an excuse to mentally and/or physically bring harm to others. Abuse is simply not acceptable. Hurt people, hurt people.
No matter what you are being told, or what is being said, you are important and worth it. Always keep this in mind.
Don’t ignore the signs.
As a domestic violence survivor, I’m happy to have found the dynamic and ever so valuable service called Bond. I strongly believe that this app can save lives and endorse it wholeheartedly.
If you or someone you love is living with an abuser, I want you to download the Bond Personal Security app today. I can tell you firsthand that it is not easy to remove yourself from this devastating and uncomfortable situation. But, we can begin to position an emergency strategic plan of action that will guide you to a safe getaway for yourself and family, permanently. But most of all, safely removed from this domestic abuse. You do not have to live in fear.
If you are unsure whether or not you are in an abusive relationship, below are a few checkpoints that I would like you to review. Being abused can leave you with diminished self-esteem, scared and confused. Please don’t ignore the signs.
Knowing the Signs
Signs may include the following:
Your partner bullies and threatens —
- Accuses you of having an affair
- Blames you for abuse
- Criticizes you
- Tells you what to wear and how you should look
- Threatens to kill you or someone close to you
- Throws things or punches walls when angry
- Yells at you and makes you feel small
Emotional abuse includes —
- Humiliating or constantly criticizing a child
- Threatening, shouting at a child or calling them names
- Making the child the subject of jokes, or using sarcasm to hurt a child
- Blaming and scapegoating
- Making a child perform degrading acts
Your partner controls your money, whereabouts and causes physical and psychological harm —
- Keeps cash and credit cards from you
- Puts you on an allowance and makes you explain every dollar you spend
- Your partner cuts you off from family and friends
- Keeps close tabs on where you go and with whom
- Makes you ask for an OK to see friends and family
- Embarrasses you in front of others, and making you want to avoid people
- Your partner physically abuses you
- Abandons you in a place you don’t know
- Attacks you with weapons
- Keeps you from eating, sleeping, or getting medical care
- Locks you in or out of your house
- Punches, pushes, kicks, bites, pulls hair
- Your partner sexually abuses you
- Forces you to have sex
- Makes you dress in a sexual way
A domestic abuser is a ticking time bomb.
ANY OF THESE SIGNS RAISE A RED FLAG?
Well, it’s time to put Plan A into action.
And, yes, you’re living with a domestic violence abuser and chances are he/she is a ticking time bomb. Thinking back when I was in an abusive relationship, I wish that I truly had a real friend or support team to help me through those horrible times. I urge you to locate a supportive Family Member or good friend that will listen and not judge you.
During COVID-19 while searching the Internet, I stumbled upon this awesome app call BOND and decided to download it and become a member. I found the service truly mind-blowing, which led me to share my story.
You can have this non-judgmental survival tool: Bond and its personal security services. When you download this app and set it up with your location, it has an awesome array of safety features that have the ability to monitor you or get you safely out of a situation with a number of solutions.
When you need the Bond personal security services, they already have your location, your safe word, and the ability to monitor you or get you safely out of the situation with solutions, including sending the authorities. Bond connects you with a live Bond Security Agent who will be available to watch you until the police arrive. Bond can also alert your preferred contact to the situation, and you can even send a concealed alert to Bond via Chat that you are in need of help. As an extra layer of safety, you can set up a Security Check from a Bond Security Agent at any time you designate. Bond also has tracking system called Track Me On The Go to monitor you while you are out walking, shopping, commuting, etc. The Bond professionally trained Security Agents will ensure that you get to your destination safety, especially if you’re escaping a domestic violence situation. They can even send you a car, if you need to discreetly, or not so discreetly to get away quickly.
Top Bond services to turn to when faced with Domestic Violence or Abuse:
Having this supportive and resourceful service is as affordable as a monthly Frappuccino. I can’t express how well-needed and useful these tools for anyone caught within the web of domestic abuse.
Use this technology.
Don’t be blinded. Emotional, physical, domestic, psychological and sexual violence are never okay.
You have the power to say this is not how your personal story is going to end.
You have the power over how your story will end.
Are you ready to live without fear?
Download Bond from the App Store
Download Bond from Google Play
